Fic: RunAway - XLVIII. Running

[silentdescant]

Series info, summary, warnings, and disclaimer

Previous chapters 

Chapter Title: Running
Chapter Summary: Dominic's always running
A/N: Sorry about last week, my schedule was just insane and I didn't have time to write. But this chapter is kinda long, so I suppose that could make up for it. *g*

Viggo stayed with Dom for several days, but eventually the time came for him to leave. Dom was doing better—at least, he was better than when Viggo had first arrived. Hans assured Viggo that he would keep an eye on their friend and drove them to the aeroport. Viggo and Dom both sat in the backseat, not really talking, while Hans kept up a steady stream of mindless chatter.

 

When the raindrops started to fall, Dom stared out the window at the gray skies, pondering the cliché-ness of the moment: the weather reflecting the mood. Hans and Viggo made idle conversation about the weather and the scenery, even the history of the buildings they were passing, but Dom wasn’t listening.

 

He thought about what had happened, and what was going to happen. He was scared, although he wouldn’t admit it to Viggo, but he didn’t really want to be protected anymore. Dom knew that Hans and Viggo would try to help him however they could, but all their help was beginning to become more of a hindrance.

 

Hearing his name, Dom shook his head and cleared his mind of it’s rambling thoughts. “Sorry, what?”

 

“I just asked if you wanted to stop and get something to eat before we dropped Viggo at the aeroport,” Hans repeated, smiling at him through the rearview mirror.

 

“Whatever you like,” Dom muttered in reply. Hans’ smile faltered, but he nodded and glanced at Viggo, who also nodded.

 

“Let’s just get something at the airport,” Viggo suggested. Hans agreed and drove on. Dom kept watching the scenery fly by out the window.

 

Once at their destination, Hans parked the car and led the way to the door. Viggo followed with his carryon bag slung over his shoulder. Dom walked distractedly behind both of them, not really thinking of anything at all. The trio made their way to a coffee shop in the lobby.

 

“I’ll go get our drinks,” Hans offered, leaving Viggo and Dom alone at the semi-secluded corner table. Dom looked down at his hands and fiddled with the sleeve of his shirt.

 

“Dominic, what are you thinking?”

 

“Nothing,” Dom answered softly. “I’m not sure if I want you to go or not.”

 

“I can stay.”

 

“That’s not it, I… I want you to go. But I don’t… I’m not making any sense, I know.”

 

“You won’t be alone when I leave, Dom. Hans will still be here for you.”

 

“But… Never mind, I don’t even know what I want to say.”

 

“How about ‘goodbye?’”

 

Dom looked up. His eyes were wide and glittery with the threat of tears. “I’m sorry, Viggo. I really am, I’m so sorry about everything.”

 

“C’mere,” Viggo murmured, beckoning Dom towards him. He saw Hans leaning against the wall with his coffee, conscientiously giving the two of them some space. Viggo pulled Dom into a hug and kissed his hair. “Just tell me you won’t do it again. Please, Dommie, tell me that.”

 

Dom rubbed his face on Viggo’s shoulder and nodded as best he could from his position. Hans cautiously approached them again.

 

“Viggo, your flight leaves very soon. You should get checked in.”

 

“Right.” Viggo stood up, pulling Dom with him. “It’ll be alright, Dom.”

 

Hans picked up Viggo’s bag and led them to the security area. Dom stood back a few steps and watched his two friends embrace and exchange whispers. They were talking about him, no doubt. Viggo then kissed Dom’s forehead again and got in line for the check in. Dom gave him his most cheerful smile, but they both knew it wasn’t real.

 

The car ride back to Dom’s flat was mostly quiet; after a few minutes, Hans realized that it wasn’t appropriate to try and fill the silence with idle talking. Dom stared out the window again, his mind on the rain.

 

They all fall down, don’t they, he thought, watching the raindrops on the window. Gravity… I wonder— Dom could practically hear himself heading down a dangerous path and consciously steered away from it. Not gravity, then. But clouds, clouds are nice. Clouds… they’re full of rain—made up of rain, really. Like… Oh god, I’ve not sunk to the level of comparing people to raindrops. Have I?

 

Hans dropped him off at his flat, saying he’d be gone a few hours and warning him not to do anything stupid. Dom climbed the stairs and clicked the open the lock on his door. Once the door was shut, he stood, motionless, surveying the flat.

 

There was trash littering the floor (none of them had wanted to clean up) and food left out in the kitchen (they hadn’t bothered to cook anything much, so it was mostly just cracker boxes and half-empty bags of crisps). There were clothes strewn about on the floor (Dom couldn’t remember the last time he’d done the laundry).

 

“I’ve got to get out of here,” Dom said aloud. He dug around in his closet and found his duffel bag, then immediately started stuffing clothes into it. Dom stripped off his t-shirt and tossed it in as well. He hurried around the flat, picking things up and putting them down again. Some of the things he decided to leave – mostly some of his CDs and movies, because they wouldn’t easily fit into the pack.

 

Dom got out a trash bag and went into the bathroom. He tossed in the shampoo and toothpaste, and then he caught sight of himself in the mirror. He stopped dead, staring at his reflection.

 

It wasn’t as if he hadn’t looked in the mirror before, but this… This was wrong. How had he not seen this before?

 

Dom ran his fingers lightly over the small scar on his wrist. It hadn’t bled that much at the time, but it still wasn’t quite fully healed. His skin looked sallow, deathly pale, his old Hawaiian tan completely eclipsed by his new look. Dom was surprised to discover that he still pictured himself as the Dominic Monaghan at the peak of his life – strong, lithe, tan, and fashionable. How had he not seen the extent of the damage he’d done to himself?

 

Dom shivered and picked up a mostly-clean shirt from the floor. He pulled it over his head quickly and avoided the mirror’s stare. He then put on a long sleeved shirt and a sweatshirt over that, then finally his coat and scarf. The clothes were out of place for the current weather, but the more things he wore, the less he’d have to carry in his bag.

 

He scribbled a quick note to Hans and stuck it on the refrigerator with a magnet. The note was short, not saying much more than a few words. Dom also left his cell phone and set of keys on the counter. With nothing more than the clothes on his back and a few items in his duffel, Dom left the flat.

 

The door locked behind him. There was no turning back.

Next: Liar