with words I thought I'd never speak

Biggest bit of news: I graduated from SCAD. \o/ This is awesome, obviously, but I already have mixed feelings because damn, I miss school. Well, not yet, but it hasn't sunk in that I won't be going back, so I feel like I still have classes to take, you know? I feel like it's just summer break. But I graduated, I won't be going back (not there, anyway; if I go to grad school at some point, it'll be somewhere else). undersea Came down a few days before and stayed with me, and we got to sit next to each other during the morning ceremony, which was really cool. Our families also got to meet, we all hung out and had dinner together, and our moms got along like... well, pick a similie.

My grandparents on both sides also came down, and we stayed at a beach house on Tybee Island after I moved out of my apartment (bye, great apartment! bye, independence! ;_____;), and from there my mom and I went up to Atlanta for a week or so to get all my stuff and a couple cars shipped to Seattle. The cars arrived a couple days ago and the rest of my stuff arrived today, and I haven't unpacked at all. For the time being, I'm just at home, job hunting. I don't know how long term I'm staying here... O.o Hopefully not TOO long, because wow, I already miss living alone/with roommates as opposed to my parents, lol.

Additions to the family: I got a puppy!! This has been several months in the making, but it wasn't a sure thing until I finally talked to my family about it right around graduation, when he came available to adopt. He was seized in a hoarding case or something and was basically tied up in legal stuff until the case finally closed--earlier than expected, which meant my sister had to adopt him for me right after graduation before I got to Seattle (I thought I would be home by the time he was available). He's a little long-haired chihuahua, VERY fluffy, black and white with black around his eyes that makes him look kind of pissed off all the time, even though he's the happiest little puppy ever. (I keep saying puppy, but he's like 2 years old. Just tiny.) I (re)named him Jack, and I call him all sorts of stupid, ridiculous names, and he got used to me pretty fast, sticks to me like glue, all that sort of stuff. \o/ My sister's also getting a new puppy (in addition to Dazzle and Peanut, who both live with her at school already), but she won't be available to adopt until August. LOTS OF DOGS. Fortunately, she goes back to school (with all three dogs) in late August, which will leave me with just Jack.

Fandom news! The biggest fandom news is that I have a new fandom now. Supernatural! Which I haven't posted about AT ALL, because I have basically avoided livejournal for MONTHS. I haven't even been on except to read fic, pretty much. Haven't even read my flist. /o\ I'M SO SORRY, I want to do better about that. Twitter's basically my main social outlet at the moment, even though half the shit I read there annoys me these days. lol

BUT, SUPERNATURAL. AND SPN RPS. So here's how it wentsulwen came to visit me in Savannah over spring break (St Patrick's Day, yay parade and drunkeness!) and forced me to watch the pilot episode. I was immediately hooked and we watched all the way into season 2 before she left. Then after she left, I continued watching NONSTOP until I caught up with the middle of season 7, which I watched as it aired. And until I had to pack up my TV, I KEPT watching spn nonstop, rewatching my favorite episodes and sequences of episodes and rewatching my favorites AGAIN AND AGAIN AND AGAIN, and right now I'm going into WITHDRAWAL. Luckily the CW and TNT both have iPad apps that can stream episodes, I just can't choose which episodes I wanna see. BUT I DON'T EVEN CARE RIGHT NOW, I just need my spn fix.

Dean is pretty much my favorite character on TV now. There's lots of thinky-thought reasons, but one very superficial reason is that Jensen Ackles is seriously pretty. I got my Jensen fix last night as I made my parents watch Ten Inch Hero (which has become my feel-good movie, and my mom enjoyed it too, yay). So that leads me to SPN RPS! Jensen and Jared as a fic pairing are as happy and fluffy as Sam and Dean are angsty and fucked up, it's pretty great. I've been reading SO MUCH FIC, lots of rps while I was still catching up with episodes, and I just recently started reading actual plotty spn fic now that season 7 has ended. SO MUCH ANGST. SO MUCH KINK. SO MUCH EXCELLENT, AMAZING FIC. Seriously, some of the fic I've read recently has been the best fic I've EVER READ. In any fandom. I had no idea the fic would be this good. I love it. Annnnnnnd I got into the fandom/finished school just in time for the gigantic spn_j2_bigbang to start posting. \o/!!! I love Sam and Dean and John and Jared and Jensen and Jeff and Misha and just EVERYBODY, it's all amazing and I'm so so so so happy rolling around in a new to me fandom.

Other fandom news: I've seen Avengers several times and LOVED IT, and Clint/Hawkeye is my favorite (UNF HOT) and he needs his own movie okay. I've been reading some good Clint/Natasha and I've always loved Tony Stark so I like him in fic, and Clint/Loki is some fucked up awesomeness. Haven't done a lot of exploring in that fandom, though, just read what I've seen recced. Other fandom stuff: Adam's album is amazing and I love it (I don't think I ever talked about that, SORRY LIVEJOURNAL), and I may be in the minority but I fucking love Tommy with his pink hair. I love Tommy full stop, really, but you already knew that. :D MCR is fairly quiet, which means my epic mcr feelings are fairly quiet at the moment, but Frank on twitter continues to be a delight, so that's always a good thing.

Plans for the foreseeable future include: seeing Brave now that my sister is back from Cuba, seeing Avengers again with her, seeing other movies as they come up, forcing my family to watch spn so I can talk about ALL OF MY FEELINGS aloud, and search for jobs. Search for a gazillion jobs. SIGH. I also want to get back to writing. My film is done, I just need to get those DVDs ready to send out, and I finally have some time to go back to writing, YAY. I have so many things planned with sulwen, you guys have NO IDEA. :DDDD

Missed you guys. Gonna try to get back in the habit of reading my flist and posting updates here. But really, if you wanna keep up with me, follow me on twitter. @silentdescant!

It is that time, that time when I ask for money.

As many of you probably know, I am a senior in film school right now. My senior project is to create a short film, of which I am the writer and director, and the goal is to submit this film to film festivals in as many places as I afford. A short film is a "calling card" for lots of filmmakers, and the stuff on my reel could land me a job. So I'm asking for your support now, because making movies costs money.

My film! ( technical and content details! )

My vague, proposed budget is around $2,500. That should cover pretty much everything, and give us good quality things when we need them (like the hotel).

Some of this money will also go to what my professor likes to call extending the "life of the film". After my senior showcase in the spring when I graduate, where my film along with all of the other films from my year will be shown in our movie theater on the big screen, student films basically die. I don't want my film to die, and I think it has a very good chance at success if I submit it to as many film festivals as I can manage. Film festival submissions cost money, but there are sometimes awards, grants, prizes, and invaluable opportunities to get my work seen by a ton of people. Film festivals are where new filmmakers get noticed, and I want to get noticed. I believe my film can get me noticed, too. So this is the biggest need for your help. There's no proposed budget for this part. The more submission money I have, the more film festivals I can submit my film to, so any little bit helps.

I will be putting together a pitch video and an official fundraising project on indiegogo which is basically like kickstarter. That's not set up yet, but it will be, and you could donate there or here. The difference will be the incentives. There, I will be offering incentives like your name in the credits of the film, set photography from the shoot, printed and signed "programs" used in a funeral scene in the film, DVDs, posters, and artwork from my storyboard artist.

Here, I am offering... well, you can have your name in the credits too, and a handwritten note of thanks in the programs from set, but my main incentive for this little donate button is fanfic. I will take prompts for the fandoms I write in, and even fandoms I'm familiar with but haven't written in before, basically whatever you want. I will write stories for you, in exchange for your support for my senior film. I've never participated in those charity auctions or fic exchanges like this before, so I don't know how other people do it, but if you donate some money we can email about prompts and whatever you want me to do for you in exchange. My email address is silentdescant@gmail.com. There's no deadline for donations, and you don't even have to give me a prompt if you don't want to (though I really do enjoy writing for people, and I would love to give you something in return for donating), and you can donate here or via indiegogo (once I get that set up in the next week or so). And there's no pressure or anything. This is just a request, if you have the cash to spare, to consider my project, and if you don't, then please pimp out this post or the indiegogo link when it's available! :)

Thank you, thank you, thank you, and I will update you on progress and all that soon!

Today was the last day of the film festival. I've been BOOKED UP this entire past week, seeing movies or going to panels from 8am to 10pm or even midnight on a couple nights. Barely had time to eat, no time for homework, didn't get much sleep, and I definitely caught a cold. But it was amazing. I've seen a lot of REALLY great stuff. Carnage, with Kate Winslet and Jodie Foster, was amazing, and it played out in real time in one location, I ADORED it. Jeff, Who Lives at Home, which was my last movie of the festival, was excellent and funny and all of the scenes were improvised, which I find fascinating. Also the co-writer/co-director who came to accept the award on behalf of him and his brother, Jay Duplass, was SUPER ADORABLE. The Artist, which was opening night, was gorgeous and really intersting. A silent black & white movie. Butter, with Jennifer Garner and Olivia Wilde, was a surprise hit, and was HILARIOUS. We Need to Talk About Kevin was fucking disturbing but... good? Crazy as hell, but Ezra Miller was great, and he was also in Another Happy Day, which I ADORED. Ellen Barkin and the writer/director Sam Levinson were here with that. Bringing Up Bobby was Famke Janssen's writing/directing debut, and I really enjoyed that a lot, and also she is gorgeous in real life. Ray Liotta was here with The Son of No One, which I thought was really great; it reminded me of The Departed, kind of? Coriolanus was really interesting... Wasn't expecting it to be THAT Shakespearian, but it was, and I thought it really worked. And A Dangerous Method, that was pretty great, and kinky, and kind of funny as well. Loved Kiera Knightly in it. Aaron Eckhart and James Marsden were both here also but I didn't get to see them (though I did see James both in a theater and outside the hotel. LOVE.). The Muppets movie had it's world premiere last night, but I opted not to wait in line to try and get a rush ticket for that, and I also didn't have a ticket for tonight's closing night movie, Like Crazy, but I'm cool with that. I ended on a really great note this afternoon (with Jeff and the Jay Duplass Q&A).

Old movies: I also saw Barry Lyndon, which was... LONG AS FUCK and I thought it was kind of boring, but Alec Baldwin and James Toback came out to talk about it so that was neat, and Born of the Fourth of July, which I hadn't seen either, but that one was really great. Oliver Stone came to talk about that, and to accept an award. Lily Tomlin was also here with The Late Show, and to be honest I remember her more than the movie! She was great, though.

Indie movies: Let Go was really quirky and interesting and definitely cute. And Take Me Home, about a woman who gets in a taxi and they travel from NY to California, that was pretty sweet and cute. There was also A Year in Mooring, with Josh Lucas and James Cromwell (who I saw many times) which was so atmospheric and gorgeous, I really enjoyed it because it didn't go through the traditional Hollywood structure. Inuk was really great too, set in Greenland, and there were no professional actors, it was crazy. All the kids were actually from the children's home up there, and the hunters were actually hunters. It was so great. The guy was a documentary filmmaker with them for a long time before asking them to be in this narrative.

The documentaries that I saw were stunning. To be honest, I think I liked them more than the narrative films. It's much harder to choose a favorite, in any case. PressPausePlay was AMAZING, and it's actually available for download on their site and you should check this shit out. It's right up your alley, and it made me so emotional about art and music and creativity. These Amazing Shadows was about the National Film Registry and it was really great too, and it's going to be on PBS on Dec 29th at 10, you should check that out too. The Bully Project was kind of mindblowing. It was about school bullies, and kids who committed suicide, and it followed a kid around at school and FILMED THE BULLYING and fuck, guys, I was crying my way through that one. The City Dark was about stars and the night sky, and light pollution in cities and even its effect on the human body. It was FASCINATING and also really stunning, but I have a thing for stars and astronomy. They made connections between breast cancer and constant light! I ate that shit up. Oh, and GROW! was about young farmers--young people getting passionate about organic farming. I liked it more than I thought I would, and the filmmakers were around all week, they were pretty great. All of the documentaries were so gorgeous, I loved them.

I went to these "Coffee Talks" almost every weekday morning, and those were fantastic. It's like a really casual panel, more like a conversation, a bunch of students and filmmakers/actors sitting around this lounge area with coffee and doughnuts having a conversation about whatever the topic of the day is. I also went to a Young Director's Forum, which was very intersting, and Bill Borden and Shawn Ku were there, and Shawn was adorable and really funny. And I went to this last-minute Screenwriters/Finding an Agent panel, and there were these two women there who were managers (as opposed to agents) and their little discussion was just so enlightening and great and I met them both afterward and gave them my card, which is always exciting. I tried to stay after the movies during the Q&As, which were pretty much all great, though of course there's always a person in the audience who asks a dumb question or embarrasses themself. Anyway, there were also several beautiful short films, which I won't name alll of, but I think North Atlantic was my favorite (also the writer/director is SO CUTE). That and Winter Frog (grenouille d'hiver). Of course I loved the two about death, but they were both beautiful, touching little stories. There were a couple good animated shorts and student shorts that I liked too.

SO, NOW, the film festival is over, and I get to sleep an extra hour tonight because of the stupid time change thing, and TOMORROW, I need to do the homework I haven't even had time to think about all week. Also tommorow will be a reading of my play on my school radio station. Which will (should) be fun! It was last year. But it also eats into my day because I'm going to be at the radio station for like 4 or 6 hours. D: But omg, once I get that done and my homework for Monday done, then I can CHILL a bit, because the rest of the quarter (JUST TWO WEEKS OMG) is much more relaxed. Haha, everyone was gearing up for the film fest and now we all gotta take a breath. I did have a chance to meet with my producer and OMG she walked into my apartment with the "how can I help you" attitude and when she walked out I felt like SUCH a weight had been lifted from my shoulders. She's great and I love her already.

Fandom-wise, I've been keeping track of things but haven't been able to participate much since I've been in movie theaters or lines ALL DAY EVERY DAY, but I am quite excited about this Adam + Queen thing going on tomorrow. There better be uploads ASAP, since I won't be home for it! Anyway, I've also missed writing a lot; sulwen and I were on a roll with our LBB (and... other things) and then I had to just abandon everything all week, so that kind of sucked. So next week we'll get back to writing and relaxing and omg I can't wait. It has been the MOST FUN. Also, Adam and Sauli are being the most precious about their anniversary right now on twitter and it's killing me with cute. I keep meaning to get back on lj more often but... well. I'm glad I can keep track of everyone via twitter, even if not many people on here are following me there.

Okay, so as some of you probably know, I'm in a playwriting class right now (and it is awesome), and we basically bring in scenes every class period and read them and critique them, and talk about writing processes and techniques and do some workshopping and basically it's the most fun class ever. BUT anyway, today we were talking about an article about like, people being afraid to write politically-driven plays, and afraid to touch certain topics, and afraid to break out of their shell, that sort of thing. And it got me thinking! Not just about that, because we also did some interesting outlining excersizes. So.... RAMBLING AHEAD. Lots of thinky thoughts about my own writing and stuff. But I really really want to hear about YOUR processes, because this is all very fascinating to me.

( blah blah blah I talk a lot )

I thiiiiink I'm just about talked out (thank god, right?). I kind of feel like there was another writing topic I wanted to address, but now I can't remember, and I don't want to get too disjointed and rambly (even more than this already is). I want to hear about your experiences! Your processes! Your hopes and dreams and inspirations! EVERYTHING. I love hearing about how writers work. Tell me things. :)

HEY SO. REMINDER. OK Go's new video, which I worked on this summer, is premiering TOMORROW (MONDAY) on Ellen DeGeneres' show! Courtney Cox is the main guest. I think the band will actually be on the show -- Dan's facebook comments were kind of vague; they're in Europe right now but flying home in time for Ellen and Leno, and they're playing Leno, but... idk what they're doing with Ellen? I'm assuming they're actually on the show, since they're premiering the video, but the preview on Ellen's site doesn't say. I feel like a commercial, but check here for local listings (wow, that's a convenient page; all shows should have that).

WHAT ELSE IS UP. ummm. I'm still really sad about my internet situation. I hope to god my RA's actually working on it and not just placating us. I feel like I'm missing SO MUCH, even though I'm almost constantly checking twitter on my phone. I can't chat, I can't watch MCR's video (on YOUTUBE, anyway, but thank you so much to wherever I downloaded it to my phone from), I can't keep up with Glamnation shenanigans, I can't comment (or even CATCH UP ON) all your posts... IT IS QUITE SAD.

I've been flipping around tuning into this stream for a while. a couple of boys trying to break the world record for kissing and GLBT equality and all that. can you imagine kissing for 33 hours without sitting or taking a break? jeez. DEDICATION. they just broke the record now, but I think their goal is like an hour beyond that or something? idk. whatever. I like it. &boys!;

boring post is boring. I've mostly been reading textbooks and making trips to the computer lab to CATCH UP ON STUFF this weekend. don't forget to tune into Ellen tomorrow! I won't be able to (UGH, CLASS) but it'll be online shortly after, I'm sure. CATCH YOU GUYS L8R. <3

First of all, ART AGAIN. I kinda finished that Gerard/Mikey VMan sketch. Tried to fix Gerard a little, though probably not enough. And what is up with Gerard's GIGANTIC HAIR in that picture? Mikey's not nearly as easy for me to draw as Gerard is, for some reason, so he's kind of crap. At least this time I had an eraser and a pencil sharpener. Again, click for bigger.



Anyway, today was pretty boring. I made the trek out to CVS for blank DVDs, and then I just came back and played a million rounds of sudoku while halfheartedly cleaning my desk and listening to The Attack of the Unsinkable Rubber Ducks by Christopher Brookmyre, narrated by Billy Boyd. I highly recommend this book (this audiobook especially, because BILLY! He does really great voices!). I think it's awesome. It's about a psychic and trying to figure out if and how he's tricking people, and it kind of delves into science vs religion as well, which I enjoy but may not be to your taste if you're really religious. But I can't really do much while I'm listening to audiobooks, I pretty much have to sit there and listen otherwise I can't pay attention. Hence the sudoku and finishing that drawing. I have about an hour of the book left to listen to.

After everybody gets back from improv (at 11, I think), we're going to film really quick (REALLY QUICK, OMG I FUCKING HOPE) and then I have to dash across town to the library and edit and burn a DVD (probably until the library closes at 1am). And I have to figure out how to return equipment at 7pm tomorrow when I have class from 5-7:30. They might possibly take it at 4:30 after my previous class, but idk. And if not, I have to leave class early. UGH I HATE THE CAGE.

film festival still has a few days left, and i am EXHAUSTED. i've been seeing movies practically every moment i'm not in class or sleeping or walking to and from the theater. so tired. i've seen some good ones so far, though: The Young Victoria, Adam, Dare, Dear Lemon Lima. hopefully I'll get some of my thoughts out after the festival's over, 'cause I would like to talk about them. I'm off to another one in about twenty minutes. I'm so fucking tired.

nano: last night my computer restarted for one of those automatic update things and I lost half of my fic, literally. I went from 4600 to 2300, which sucks so bad. what I'm rewriting isn't as good, so far, and it feels shorter, which is sad. but honestly, I don't have time to think about it right now. I talked over my screenplay with my teacher and now I'm more excited about finishing that now, and that's my priority for writing at the moment. I know I can make up lost time in nano once I'm not out and about all fucking day. I know maryangel200 and wonder_walldbc are doing well with their wordcounts, though, so congratulations. ♥

I know I owe several of you emails; I'm really sorry about not getting back to you. I WILL, I promise, but I'm not even going to think about it until after this weekend. Also, I'm leaving this post unlocked for a meme; do this for me, please? I've always wanted to do real commentary for my fic.


Pick a paragraph (or any passage less than 500 words) from any fanfic I've written, and comment to this post with that selection. I will then give you a DVD commentary on that snippet: what I was thinking when I wrote it, why I wrote it in the first place, what's going on in the character's heads, why I chose certain words, what this moment means in the context of the rest of the fic, lots of awful puns, and anything else that you'd expect to find on a DVD commentary track.

Because I know you guys are sooo interested... And I'm posting it before it's been graded because I don't care what my teacher says about it, I'm pretty proud of it. It's pretty short, as far as research papers go (slightly over 2000 words), but it's kind of dense, so. :\




( the paper )


( works cited and bibliography [this is CRAZY LONG] )


So that's a research paper in, like, what, three days? /o\ I had to pretty much start over from scratch after the draft I sent in. Now I only have one more discussion to post and I am DONE with this class. And pretty much done with art history! \o/

1. GO READ THE THIRD INSTALLMENT OF UNHOLYVERSE. and if you haven't read Unholyverse, GO DO THAT. It is by bexless and it is amazing and owns my soul. Even if you're not into bandom at all, you should read this fic. It is seriously that amazing. It's like C-verse for lotrips, only with less kinky sex. hahaha

2. I don't think I posted about this (though I twittered/facebooked/flailed at people in gchat), but I FINALLLLLLLY finished writing my BBB fic. Yeah, I know it's almost the end of the month, shut up. IT WILL GET EDITED, I SWEAR. Just.... very very quickly. :\ BUT IT'S DONE, and that's the point, and it's something like 57k and it's EPIC, OKAY, and I am still in love with it and cannot WAIT for you guys to read it.

3. I reinstalled my drivers and managed to fix my audio and DVD-player computer issues. THEREFORE: LOTMS TONIGHT. It was great, and the video wasn't even jumpy and stuttery. I LOVE THIS BAND.

( 4. I fucked up my journal layout, sorry; 5. school is so close to being done I can taste it. )

6. I still have 2 Dreamwidth invite codes. Comment or send me a message with your email address if you want one.

A very general sort of update, since I haven't posted in FOREVER.

( In which I ramble on about drawing things. and Gerard. )

( and then about writing things, and classes! )

( bandom bandom bandom )

( photographic evidence of Frank and Gerard being RIDICULOUSLY PRETTY )

HAVE A NICE DAY. <3333!