Fic: RunAway - XXXV. Low

[silentdescant]

Series info, summary, warnings, and disclaimer

Previous chapters

Chapter Title: Low

Chapter Summary: Dom reaches a new low
Warning: This chapter contains drug abuse, non-con, and above all, a ton of angst. Ye be warned. This is about as graphic as the angst is going to get, though.

Dom felt better than he had in weeks. He was out with Hans, Geoff and Wes at a club, and he had even danced for a while. At Hans’ insistence, Dom had had nothing alcoholic to drink, but to Dom’s surprise, he didn’t really mind. He was holding a soda and watching Hans move and writhe in time to the music with the crowd of other dancers. Wes tapped him on the shoulder, motioning the exit. After a moment, Dom understood that Wes was leaving and he waved goodbye happily. He watched Wes join Ericka by the door and kiss hungrily. Dom smirked. Then he laughed.

 

By the time Hans made his way back to the bar, Dom was giggling hysterically.

 

“What’s going on?”

 

“Nothing, that’s just it! Wes left with Ericka. I guess we’ll have to take a cab.”

 

“Nick, why are you laughing?” asked Hans, still obviously confused.

 

“I’m happy, Hans.”

 

“That’s good. That’s really good, Nick.” Hans chuckled. “C’mon, dance with me and Geoff!”

 

***

 

After another half an hour of dancing and chatting with various people, Hans pulled Dom into a semi-quiet corner. He looked faintly nervous.

 

“Nick, I’m going to go home with Geoff. We can all share a cab, if you like. We can drop you at your flat on our way.”

 

“You and… Oh. Right.” Dom swallowed down the absurd feeling of jealousy and rejection and tugged a smile back onto his face. “Nah, I’ll be fine. My flat’s in the other direction anyway. I’ll just…”

 

“It’s not any trouble, Nick, really.”

 

“Hans, I’ll be fine. I’ll probably just walk. Don’t live that far away. And anyway, fresh air is good for me, right?” Dom asked casually, but Hans could sense the hurt in Dom’s tone.

 

“Dominic, I don’t want to leave you here alone,” Hans said plainly. “At least come outside with us, so we can actually hear ourselves think.”

 

***

 

Hans voiced his several (justified, deserved) concerns about leaving Dom alone, but Dom would have none of it. After finally convincing Hans that he could indeed walk back to his flat unaccompanied, Dom started off on foot in one direction while Hans and Geoff took a cab in the other.

 

As he kicked a piece of trash out of his path, Dom thought hard about his feelings. He was jealous, of course, that Hans found a new lover. He knew that Hans and Geoff were exploring a relationship, and that whatever had happened between himself and Hans was over, but until tonight, Hans and Geoff had been separate. They had been two people dancing around each other instead of a couple, HansandGeoff. He felt hurt and betrayed. Dom was angry at Geoff for God knows what. And while Dom knew that none of these feelings were truly justified, he couldn’t help the fact that they were there nonetheless.

 

His thoughts turned to Billy, as they always seemed to do, and the happiness Dom had felt earlier evaporated instantly. He wondered vaguely what Billy was doing right then, and if he was happy now that Dom was gone. A small part of his brain insisted that Billy would never be happy without him, as only half of the BillyandDom show, but Dom pushed the thought away, claiming it’s only a hope. A fool’s hope, Dom thought sadly.

 

The quote made him think of Ian, and that thought morphed into others of his friends and family. Of his life.

 

Dom stopped in his tracks, gasping at the sharp pain in his heart. He sank down to the ground and leaned against a signpost, clutching it for support.

 

“Why did I think I was okay?” Dom muttered to himself. “I’ll never be okay. I’ll never get over this.”

 

Dom’s eyes flitted around the street and finally landed on a tall, sturdily built man with three other men standing around him. Dom watched them for a moment. One of the shorter men laughed manically, the high-pitched noise echoing down the nearly deserted street. The tall one glared at the laugher and handed out little baggies of pills and powder to all three men.

 

Drugs, Dom realized. The three men scampered off, leaving the tall dealer alone on the corner. The man, Dom suddenly noticed, was staring at him. Dom rose slowly to his feet and crossed the street cautiously. The man’s eyes never left Dom.

 

“What do you need, boy?”

 

“Anything you can give me,” Dom replied after a moment’s hesitation.

 

“Do you have money?”

 

Dom checked his pockets. Not enough for a can of soda, much less anything that would dull the pain in his heart.

 

“Get lost, kid.”

 

“I’m not a kid. Please, I need something.”

 

“No money, no deal. Unless…”

 

“What? Please, I will do anything. I just need to… I need… please…” Dom looked up at the man, his eyes frantic and his voice desperate. The man leered down at him.

 

“You’ll do anything?”

 

“What do you want?”

 

“You.” The man glanced up and down the street before pulling Dom into a darkened alley. “You still want the drugs?”

 

“Yes.”

 

The man reached into his coat and placed two pills in Dom’s outstretched hand. Dom tossed them into his mouth and grimaced as he swallowed. The man grinned again. He asked Dom’s name, but didn’t give one in return.

 

When the drugs started to take effect, Dom breathed a sigh of relief. He could feel himself relax and the pain dim.

 

The high was short-lived, however, and all of the sudden, edges got sharper, colors grew darker, and the dealer’s eyes looked beady and black. Dom shrank back from the hard gaze and closed his own eyes. The action only produced a feeling of vertigo, and Dom’s hands jerked out, trying to hold on to something for support. Dom finally backed into the wall and slid down it to his knees. He fell forward and caught himself on his hands, bloodying his left palm on some sharp thing on the ground. Dom hoped it wasn’t glass. The pain was sharp for a brief moment, then dulled to an ache. Dom held his palm up to his face, but his eyes couldn’t focus on the wound. That’s when he noticed that everything was no longer sharp, but blurry, as if he was spinning too fast to see the world around him. The feeling made Dom nauseous, and he inhaled deeply, trying to calm his stomach.

 

The man stood over him, unmoving. Dom raised his eyes but couldn’t see the other man’s face from his vantage point. Instead, Dom looked at his boots. They were black. Or were they gray? Dom couldn’t tell. He knew they were shiny, however, because he could see his own face staring back at him. The severity of his situation finally hit home. He tried to stand up. Dom felt the man’s hand on his shoulder and recognized that it was not helping him up, but instead pushing him down. The dominance the dealer was exuding felt overpowering, and Dom closed his eyes again. The feeling didn’t lessen.

 

“You don’t need to get up,” he snarled.

 

Dom knew the rules. He’d played games like this with Billy before. He knew how to be submissive. He also knew that now was the time to get the fuck out of the alley.

 

But he couldn’t stand up. The hand was still firm on his shoulder, and Dom’s arms and legs were beginning to feel like jelly. He thought of crawling away, towards the brightly lit street corner, but the man seemed to sense this thought and he gripped Dom’s t-shirt in fist.

 

“You don’t need to move, really.”

 

The hand, still fisting his shirt, pushed him backwards until he was leaning against the brick wall again.

 

Dom gasped when the back of his skull hit the brick. His eyes flew open, but nearly all of the meager light was blocked by the dealer’s body.

 

“F-feel sick,” Dom murmured, the drugs slurring his speech. “Can’t. Oh, God…” What little light there suddenly felt blinding and Dom covered his face with his hand. He could smell the coppery tang of blood on his palm still.

 

“Are you trying to get out of paying, Nicky?” the man growled.

 

“N-no. Just. Don’t feel. Don’t want th— Oh, fuck…” Dom replied haltingly. He was surprised by how apologetic his voice sounded. Don’t wanna be submissive to a fucking drug dealer, just wanna leave.

 

“Then you’ll pay for it. That was the agreement.”

 

Dom nodded slowly, even the slight movement making him dizzy. When he opened his eyes again, everything was blurry and seemed to move around a lot, making it harder to focus. He could see a hand in front of his face. It wasn’t his own. It grasped his chin and forced Dom’s face upward until he was looking nearly straight up in the air. From this angle, Dom could see the drug dealer’s face, although it was too blurry to make out any details of the expression.

 

Dom heard the metallic sound of the man unzipping his trousers, and the sound amplified and echoed inside his head.

 

“Oh, shite…” Dom breathed, mind quite clear all of the sudden.

 

“No need to talk, Nicky. That mouth’ll be busy anyway.”

Next: Call, part one - Dom